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The incident, however, did not end with the bombing of Kelley's truck. "We were [then] engaged by small-arms fire," recalls Kelley. "Our gunners were shooting back." "The thing is, we'd been out on patrol, and we were actually going back to refit," says Kelley, regarding his platoon leader's fateful decision to order "one last sweep" of the major supply route they'd been inspecting that day. "We were going back to get more fuel, more water...We were actually going to make it back in time for a hot meal---something that was only possible maybe three times a month!"

Part I   "...I was in the third vehicle, the one that took the hit. When the thing blew up on us, it pushed me down into the floorboard. I didn't think I had any legs anymore, from the pain I was feeling...I remember telling our driver to stop, but he wasn't even there anymore." ---David Kelley   The main reason a very restless David Kelley entered the military at 17 was that he was tired of school. "I called every branch," he remembers. "I left messages with all of them; The Navy was the first to call me back." And so Kelley began his military service as a Navy man in 1994.

Wow. This ring thing must be really touchy business...    One of the zaniest old sitcoms on TV was "The Nanny", which happened to star one of the funniest women on the planet, Fran Drescher. As many will remember, even though this Queens-born Nice Single Jewish Girl might occasionally think about something besides marriage, her giant-haired mother, Sylvia, never for a second wavered in her own desire to see The Nanny hitched and living the high life on Long Island. And with each passing day...month...year...Sylvia became less and less choosy about possible candidates for son-in-law.

"...Then, suddenly, he began to quiz me briefly but explicitly, officially establishing my status as a common criminal..."    Well, I'd set up on this particular afternoon, replacing a hardy, fresh-faced high school boy who'd been working miracles with the bagpipes. He was kilted out and richly gifted; I could have listened for hours, but he told me that he might die if he actually tried to play the pipes non-stop for hours. He wished me luck and then went on his way. I suppose luck is a relative quantity, when you think about it. Funny thing: I'd never really noticed the police in Melbourne at all, and didn't have any idea how they related to buskers. So shortly after nightfall,

...Gee, Officer---How did I know you needed a license to perform on the streets of Melbourne?   Just a few days of sitting and strumming for hours on the street can give you amazing insights into human nature and tendencies---as can all business that is done in so direct a manner, I would imagine. It's important not to go out with enormous expectations when busking, if you really hope to enjoy it in a big way. In the same way that not everyone is inclined to stop in at this auto body shop or that restaurant, not everyone lies awake at night dreaming of paying to hear you do your Guitar Hero thing, either!